Step 1: Take friend on an airplane.
Step 2: Have pilot make believe plane is crashing.
Step 3: Have friend jump off plane with parachute.
Step 4: Friend will swim to nearby Island.
Step 5: Friend reaches Island and Wild Party ensues full of hookers and midgets.
Step 6: Friend passes out and everyone leaves.
Step 7: Friend awakes all alone.
Step 8: Friend commits suicide.